I'm going to be honest with you about something: I have a slight fear of being 'alone' for the rest of my life. It's not an overbearing thought nor is it a thought that constantly plagues me. But it is something that I think about from time to time. And sometimes I even pray for God to send me someone.
So this morning, as I was preparing for my day, I started thinking about this. The thought popped into my head that I should just stop thinking about it. After all, it's usually when you least expect it the God sends you someone, right? Chuck Testa. I have heard this a thousand times and I decided today that I disagree with this sentiment.
Before I explain to you why I feel this way, let's make sure that I am clear about a couple of things. First of all, Jesus Christ is at the center of my focus. I desire to follow God's will for my life. In following His will, the top priority for me is to be the best father that I can be for my daughter. After that, I have been called to ministry and am also focused on the matters of this calling. Lastly, there are other matters that also have priority. So finding a wife is not even on my radar at the moment. Pretty much long range sensors only. I'm not ruling out any possibilities that may arise, however.
I just lost the game.
Let's get on with it...
Like I've said, I've heard it a thousand times: "Stop looking. God will send you someone when you least expect it." The main issue that I have with this is that there is nothing in the Bible that supports this thought (I welcome your disagreement). In fact, it is mostly to the contrary: If you want a wife, then you seek a wife, and then you find a wife. I was first reminded of Proverbs 18:22, "He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord."
And also Proverbs 31:10, "A wife of noble character who can find?"
We also read in Genesis 24 of how Abraham sent his servant to find a wife for Isaac.
Interesting, right? I mean, think about it. To find something typically means that you have to look for something. I guess it's possible to find something that you're not looking for, but that can only mean two things. Either the item you found wasn't yours and should be returned to the person it belongs to, or you really don't care that much about whatever it was because you didn't realize that you should have been looking for it in the first place. (my apologies for the run-on. I'm tired)
I'll wrap it up by saying that I am not actively looking, but I am looking. Big deal. If I find a wife, then great. If not, well at least I'll not have wasted much of my time. And who knows, maybe I don't even qualify for a second chance -- I'm learning to be ok with that.
